


"I'm fine" [I'm really not, please just help this go away]

by Blueeyedlistener



Series: Alec's Stories (Also including Riku) [12]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Alec breaks for a while, He "dies", Some serious stuff happens, maybe mentally, more emotionally than anything, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-04
Updated: 2016-10-04
Packaged: 2018-08-19 11:57:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8206066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blueeyedlistener/pseuds/Blueeyedlistener
Summary: Another idea inspired by an episode of 'Rescue Me'.Alec's also involved.Everyone tries to help but it doesn't seem to be working.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Another idea inspired by an episode of 'Rescue Me'.  
> Alec's also involved.  
> Everyone tries to help but it doesn't seem to be working.

Everything felt numb. He wasn't an alcoholic, but man did Alec feel like he needed a drink.  He kept hearing the same words over and over; He knew they were supposed to be comforting, but boy were they doing the opposite for him. "I'm so sorry" , "If you need anything, please let me/us know". 

In a way, he felt guilty himself. He should've been there, He should've taken the day off; This was all his fault and nothing would've convinced him otherwise. The lights stayed off, it hurt Alec too much to look at anything bright, even the light from outside hurt; The house hadn't been cleaned since the whole incident happened and Alec couldn't find a care in him to change it. Clothes were piling on the floor from when alec would change clothing, which became only when he showered. He had a lot of things hurt him up to this point, but nothing made him lose control or feel as bad as this, or at least to what he could recall. 

Laying in his bed, his phone started to ring. Checking it, he read the contact and set it back down. His mother. Maybe he'd call her back later, though he knew he wouldn't because she'd just become one of the many people who couldn't get in contact with him. Instead, he stared at the blank wall in front of his view as the scene replayed. 

_"Alec, I'm so sorry!" Looking at the woman in front of him, his amber eyes met her green ones that were becoming overfilled with tears. "Honey, what happened?" Sirens. Why were there sirens? He scanned desperately but she tried to stop him from going inside; Seeing her on the floor did enough damage. Running over, he tried to shake her awake but he could tell it was no use. The paramedics arrived and Alec and his girlfriend met them at the hospital, though she was pronounced dead upon arrival. Their daughter. Their daughter, who was perfectly fine when he left for work that morning was now nothing but a shell of what once was._

Alec still didn't have the answer, no one would reveal it to him. All he could gather was she got a hold of something, a chemical or medicine or something; No one would say anything else. Picking up the closest thing to him, his arm threw it against the wall as hard as possible; He hoped it would've calmed the anger but it didn't, not one bit. Meanwhile, he didn't know what upset him more; The fact that his girlfriend had just up and left like nothing happened or the fact that he let himself get so bad but for once, he was just too tired to care. 

He could've talked to his mother, or his father. Hell, even his brother, but something in him wouldn't allow it. Maybe he felt he should've been stronger about this? Maybe he should've prevented this whole thing somehow? Maybe it was his fault after all. More guilt worked its way in; He knew his brother hated kids, so he couldn't help but try not to make his brother be surrounded by a child, though he did feel bad when it happened. Maybe he should've said no to having kids, maybe this was a sign? Alec didn't know, and he just wanted to sleep but he had stopped sleeping the last few nights. The only sleeping he did was when he broke down and took sleeping pills. 

"Everyone would be so disappointed.. huh.. I just.. don't have it in me to do anything." He knew at this point mom was worried because he didn't answer his phone which was rare, and he knew she was either telling/calling dad out of worry or his brother- both options of which, didn't make things better. Dad wasn't good at trying to comfort anyone, he tried, and it sometimes worked but certain topics were being adapted to and his brother, well, his brother was a different topic. Honestly, Alec was more concerned about his brother showing up than even if mom had called the cops to see if Alec was still alive at that point. 

What made it worse? He couldn't remember if his brother even had a key to his home. Which, that didn't stop his brother at times; He knew he could talk to his brother and all, but he didn't know how he was supposed to. Maybe if he was lucky, maybe his brother would skip on visiting, at least until he got over this.. if, he got over this.  
  
He didn't know how long he could hold up his emotions or "I'm fine, promise" if it came down to talking to Riku. That alone, didn't make things better.

 


End file.
